Many may recall that I have voiced grave concern over the summer about the makeup of this team. I had several worries that were leading me to believe that Philadelphia could be in for a long year. Well, so far my trepidation has been for naught. I know they’ve only played three games so far, but after three wins, the club is head and shoulders above where I thought they would be. I will now address some of these issues and then detail why they aren’t (at least currently) the problems I believed they would be.

• Ray Emery: Alright, when the Flyers eschewed the steady Martin Biron and Antero Nittymaki for the head case that is goalie Ray Emery, I wasn’t pleased. While
  

  Call me Razor... or I'll cut you.

  Emery did take the Ottawa Senators to the Finals a few years ago, he became such an off-ice problem and was so streaky that no team wanted to take a chance on him and he was banished to Russia’s KHL. However, after a full year there, Philly took a chance on him. After all, the city loves rebuilding projects (see: Michael Vick, Jeremiah Trotter, Brad Lidge, Pedro Martinez, Paul Coffey… the list goes on and on), so it made perfect sense. But who knows? Maybe the KHL did Razor some good. Through his three wins he has looked extremely sharp, quick and square to the shooter. However, most of all, he’s been incredibly composed. That’s the main thing. There hasn’t even been a hint of psychosis yet. A shutout in his first game against Carolina was impressive. Against New Jersey the other night, I thought the short-handed goal he gave up to Jamie Langenbrunner was a bit soft, and he also iced the puck on the power play (which should never happen), but otherwise he was brilliant and I can’t take anything away from him. And yes, last night against the Caps he did let up five tallies, but most of them weren’t his fault (though I didn’t love the Morrison goal. I felt rebounds were a problem for him through the preseason). So, while he hasn’t been perfect, he hasn’t needed to be and he does look solid. I may have to eat my words on this one, but then again, he IS streaky and we’re only three games in.

• The signing of Chris Pronger: Whoa, take it easy. I don’t have a problem with Pronger. He’s awesome, and a future Hall of Famer. The problem was that I thought it might leave us a little thin on D, taking into account Pronger’s salary, Luca Sbisa leaving in the deal, the subsequent demotion of Randy Jones, and the fact that the team might be relying on the aging backliner a little too much. However, Chris has only lightened the load on his fellow defensive mates and made them better. Kimmo Timonen and Braydon Coburn no longer have to shut down the opposition’s top players on their own, and they already appear much fresher with Pronger logging a ton of time. Also, Matt Carle (4 assists last night!) has been stellar alongside Pronger and is now looking like a poor man’s Scott Niedermayer. It seems that the coach, John Stevens, is using everyone properly, and with the four of them working in tandem (and not solely asking Pronger to do everything) I’m not worried anymore.

• The goon patrol: No one has any idea how elated I was to see the opening night lineup without Riley Cote and Arron Asham on the roster. While the Flyers don’t have a true heavyweight, they have plenty of toughness with Dan Carcillo and Ian Laperriere. I really thought Stevens was going to start the year with all four of these grinders on the ice (not to mention the nights when Ole-Kristian Tollefsen plays), and the resulting penalties and lack of offensive would sink the squad. Thankfully, cooler and smarter heads prevailed. And let’s give double thanks that rookies James vanRiemsdyk and Mika Pyorala were good enough to make the team (and look great). Granted, the team has still taken a ton of penalties and that’s going to continue, but the penalty kill has been fantastic and will need to continue to perform like a top-ten unit all year for the Flyers to have a chance. Sure, there will be nights when, depending on injuries and the team they’re playing, that Cote and Asham do dress, and tensions will boil over to resemble a scene from Slap Shot, but at least it will be interesting. Besides, Jeff Carter and Mike Richards look incredible right now, so maybe the team will still have enough offense on those nights to win.

It’s gonna be an interesting year, for sure, but regardless of what happens, I feel an orange and black attack coming on.

It's time for hockey, so I must break you.

Now, I know that most of the readers of this site are obviously sports fans, but I’d be willing to bet dollars to donuts that most of our coveted readers probably care more about what Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag are up to than my fantasy hockey team. However, to paraphrase Ivan Drago, “When I write, I write for me! For me!” In other words, I really don’t care, but in the interest of not alienating too many people, I will try to expand coverage of my recently-drafted ’09-’10 team to include some commentary on fantasy sports in general and the upcoming NHL season (Also, stay tuned for my upcoming Flyers preview… I know we’re a bunch of homers here). So, if all the folks out there in cyber land don’t have any interest in this piece, meh, I understand, but for anyone who does, buckle up.

Oh yeah, and I’m also well aware that many people out there consider fantasy sports to be silly child’s play, but to that I say, “I know you are but what am I?” Anyway, trust me, fantasy sports are great. For example, the fantasy version of myself is currently the proud general manager and coach of both an NHL and NFL team, and on any given night I can plan, strategize and just plain root for my favorite (and unfortunately sometimes hated, you out there Patrik Elias?) pro players to do well in order to deliver me some bragging rights and a meager cash prize. I know it may sound pathetic to some, but the reality version of myself is only going to sit around the house on a Friday night, get drunk on various leftovers of summer ale, watch reruns of Charles in Charge and contemplate the pros and cons of getting a mail-order bride over the Internet. Therefore, I might as well keep myself busy, right? Right. Don’t get me wrong, anyone losing sleep at night over who to start on Randy Moss’ bye week is a total loser and should probably be forced to smell his jockstrap, but done in moderation, there’s nothing wrong with a little fantasy. Now that that’s out of the way, let’s talk draft.

So, in the spirit of having nothing better to do, I made the hour-long trek to my commish’s

Roberto Luongo: "What do you mean I don't deserve to go #1 overall? I have great hair."

house the other night with the high hopes of acquiring a championship team. Now, I’ve been fortunate enough to finish in the money in this NHL league in five of the last six years, but I’ve only taken home the crown once, so this year I really wanted to focus and do my homework. When I got there, I drew the third pick, so I was in good shape, but I could forget about Alexander Ovechkin (Incidentally, here’s a quick scoring breakdown: goals are 2 points, 3 for D-men, with bonuses for power play, short-handed and game winners, and assists are 1 point. However, goalies are HUGE in our league with 4-5 points for a win, depending on save percentage). It’s in drafters’ best interest to grab net-minders early, but Ovie is just too good to pass up for the sheer amount of goals he scores. Surprisingly, with the first overall pick, player #1 selected Roberto Luongo! Now, while not a bad pick, I didn’t even have Luongo as the #1 goalie. I was hoping player #2 would be equally ignorant, so the prized left-winger would fall in my lap, but it wasn’t to be. I ended up taking my same starting goalie from last year, Evgeni Nabokov. Remember, wins count the most and while San Jose consistently chokes in the playoffs, they’re still going to win plenty of games in the regular season.

Let me explain this selection a bit more, as many will probably criticize me for not taking Martin Brodeur or even Evgeni Malkin. I wouldn’t blame anyone for taking either player over Nabby, but I generally don’t believe in drafting a forward first. Doing the math, as long as Nabokov stays healthy, it makes more sense to take the goalie who is almost assured 40 wins than a forward who will score 100 points. Besides, there are plenty of great centers I can draft later, and the goalie talent is somewhat thin this year, as far as fantasy goes. As far as Brodeur is concerned, I’ll admit I broke my own rule. That rule is that until he shows signs of slowing down, Marty should be the first goalie off the board no matter what. However, I’m worried about the Devils this year. They lost some players, and they’re in a tough division. Conversely, San Jose should wipe the floor with the Pacific, hence my decision.

Moving on, I also must relay that I’m in a league with a bunch of fellow homers, so it should come as no surprise that people reached a little early for Flyers, except for me, of course. However, this year was a little extra ridiculous with players such as Ryan Parent even getting picked, albeit late. The worst pick of the draft? Someone actually selected James vanRiemsdyk in the 11^th round, out of 24. Look, I really like the kid but he’s not even a lock to stay with the team all year, and he was taken over guys such as Martin Havlat and Patrick Marleau! I’m proud to report that I was able to snag Danny Briere in the middle rounds, though (he was the only Flyer to go around where he should have, except for maybe Scott Hartnell, selected by my buddy Jason in the later rounds). Please stay healthy, Danny. He looks fantastic in pre-season. He was the only Flyer was I able to get, but if anyone thinks I’m gonna sacrifice a championship season by pulling a groin reaching for Darroll Powe in the fifth round, then they’ve been watching Riley Cote get his head beat in for too long and are getting punch drunk by association.

Riley Cote: "What do I bring to this team, again?"

OK, so I’m not going to go on recounting the entire night, but I am curious to know what everyone thinks, so here’s my team:

At center (3 start) I have Ryan Getzlaf (Ducks), Danny Briere (Flyers), Derek Roy (Sabres) and Mike Ribeiro (Stars).

At left wing (3 start) I have Rick Nash (Blue Jackets), Daniel Sedin (Canucks), Chris Kunitz (Penguins) and Slava Kozlov (Thrashers).

At right wing (ditto) I have Jarome Iginla (Flames), Brad Boyes (Blues), Jason Pomenville (Sabres) and J.P. Dumont (Predators… I broke another of my rules taking him, but more on that later).

On defense (6 start) I have Jay Bouwmeester (Flames), Scott Niedermayer (Ducks), Rob Blake (Sharks), Brent Burns (Wild), Cam Barker (Blackhawks), Jaroslav Spacek (Canadiens), Tom Gilbert (Oilers) and Erik Johnson (Blues).

In goal (2 start) I have Evgeni Nabokov (Sharks), Cam Ward (Hurricanes), Cristobal Huet (Blackhawks) and… we added a new wrinkle this year. It’s called the sleeper pick. At the end of the draft each drafter can select one extra player at any position and that player who does the best gets an extra cash prize at the end of the year. This player can’t be dropped or traded. My pick? Jose Theodore (Capitals). If he can win the starting job, I’m a lock for this.

So, what does everyone think? Can I win the title this year? Does my team suck? Should I have drafted Radek Bonk instead? Let me know.

There’s one more thing I must mention. It seems that fantasy isn’t always better than reality. Our fellow colleague and friend, Brian, and his wife Allison recently gave birth to their first child. A big congratulations to them both. Let’s hope all three of them are doing well, and let’s welcome Abigail Sara into the world. Don’t worry Abby, your daddy’s fantasy football team is a lost cause, so he’ll have plenty of time to take care of you. Oh, and I’ll be sure to teach you all about Star Wars…

No, you're not seeing double. We're both equally good.

Vancouver Canucks: I hate to pat myself on the back, but at the beginning of the summer I predicted that the Sedin Twins would stay put in Vancouver, and I was of course, correct. Really, where else would they possibly go? There’s no way that the city would let them go or else they would be completely sunk. They’re the cornerstone of the franchise. Considering the frailty of Pavol Demitra, and the indecision of the now Brett-Favre-esque Mats Sundin, Vancouver needs the twins to provide the bulk of their offense. However, the team didn’t stop with the re-signing of Daniel and Henrik. They re-signed stellar goalie Roberto Luongo for twelve years, so that position is all locked up. (Incidentally, I don’t understand the new age of ridiculously long contracts. They’re recipes for disaster. Just ask the New York Islanders, but more on that later.) They also signed capable backup Andrew Raycroft just in case something happens to their franchise goalie. Additionally, they stole underrated forward Mikael Samuelsson from Detroit and re-signed D-man Shane O’Brien. O’Brien isn’t a household name, but he’s still a solid stay-at-home backliner. They did lose Mattias Ohlund to Tampa Bay, but don’t worry. Vancouver also signed the aging but still relevant Mathieu Schneider, and gave some draft picks to San Jose for Christian Ehrhoff and Brad Lukowich, so they’re loaded at defense. Including the emergence of hated forwards Ryan Kesler and Alexandre Burrows, look for the Canucks to make major noise this year. They had a nasty playoff series with Chicago last season, and while I’m sticking with my Chicago boys, anything could happen as far as who comes out of the West this year.

Calgary Flames: The Flames made their biggest acquisition at the draft this year when they made a trade with Florida for star defenseman Jay Bouwmeester. Many may be familiar with the young backliner’s offensive talent, but he never saw his full potential realized while struggling with Florida’s lackluster squad. Behind a relatively strong defense, look for Bouwmeester’s +/- to jump exponentially this year, making him a top 10 D-man. He’ll also have his former teammate in Florida, Olli Jokinen, at center for a full year to help out the offense. Jokinen looks feisty in camp this season, even engaging in a fight. It looks like linemate Jarome Iginla is rubbing off on him. Of course, the other big story in Calgary is the aging and diminutive Theo Fleury getting a second chance at life. Folks may remember Fleury getting bounced from the league a handful of years ago due to drug problems, but now at 41 years of age, is being offered another shot at making the club. Now, I’m certainly not a big believer in this move. If we’ve learned anything from San Jose’s Claude Lemieux experiment, it’s that there’s no place for geriatric forwards who haven’t played at the NHL level in years. It’s simply a much different league now. However, having said that, if there IS anyone who could make a comeback like this, it’s Theo. In his heyday, Fleury was a superstar and a fast one at that. I have my doubts, but he may just help a team that I feel is a bit limited in the depth department, but it will be in a limited capacity. However, anything is possible for the Flames when they have Miikka Kiprusoff as their goalie. He’s never mentioned in the same breath as Brodeur and Luongo, but he should be.

Edmonton Oilers: The Oilers are sporting a touch of a new look this season. They have some solid, young talent up front, and with the addition of Nikolai Khabibulin in goal, the Oil could do some damage. Even at 36, Khabibulin is an upgrade over Dwayne Roloson. Hopefully, they’ll be able to keep defensemen Lubomir Visnovsky and Sheldon Souray for a full year (one each lost to injury in the past two seasons), and they’ll also have talented forward Patrick O’Sullivan for a full year from a late-season, three-team trade with Carolina and L.A. Additionally, they recently signed Mike Comrie from Ottawa to a deal. Now, I think Comrie is a complete fraud, and I think it’s now too late in his career for the well-traveled forward to be relevant. He should just stick to carousing with Hilary Duff. However, who knows? He might be able to help youngsters Sam Gagner and Andrew Cogliano at forward who The Hockey News are predicting big point jumps from this season. Hey, the St. Louis Blues miraculously made the playoffs last season, so anything is possible.

Mike Comrie: "Please step aside. I may suck, but my wife is hot."

Minnesota Wild: The big signing for the Wild this off-season was the luring of right-winger Martin Havlat from Chicago to replace the loss of Marian Gaborik. As far as Minnesota is concerned, this move makes little sense to me. Granted, Havlat is almost a point-per-game player WHEN HE PLAYS. Considering all the problems the Wild had with Gaborik, never knowing when he was going to play, I’m dumbfounded as to why they would take a chance on the equally-made-of-glass Havlat. However, maybe it doesn’t really matter. Minnesota is primarily a defensive squad even though new coach Todd Richards has claimed he’s going to let his boys roam a little freer. Additionally, they recently acquired Petr Sykora who became an afterthought in Pittsburgh last season. Sykora underperformed last year, but he’s a good fit in Minnesota and should help their offense. They also claimed steady D-man Greg Zanon from Nashville who should bolster their already decent crew. The Wild could squeak into the playoffs this year.

Colorado Avalanche: Once upon a time, Colorado was one of the kings of the Western Conference. Now, they’re sadly in the rebuilding phase. The retirement of first-ballot Hall of Famer Joe Sakic is really going to hurt them. However, it’s time for young gun Paul Stastny to take over the team. Stastny is going to be just as good as his dad Peter was, but it’s going to be some time before he gets some help. The club started getting him assistance over the summer, trading gritty forward Ryan Smyth to L.A. for defensemen Kyle Quincey and Tom Preissing. This is a tremendous upgrade on D for the Avs, but after that there’s not much. They also snatched semi-capable goalie Craig Anderson from Florida, and he will challenge Peter Budaj for the starting job, which should light a fire under Budaj and that would be a good thing for the team… about the only good thing.

San Jose Sharks: Well, the insolent Dany Heatley has finally gotten his wish. After

Dany Heatley: "Yeah, I'm a total baby, and arguably the ugliest player in the NHL, but I'm also an all-star."

demanding a trade from the Ottawa Senators because he just couldn’t get along with new head coach Cory Clouston, but yet refusing a deal that would have sent him to Edmonton earlier in the summer, Heatley has finally landed in the Shark Tank. Despite what seems to be an intense immaturity on Heatley’s part, he remains one of the most talented forwards in the NHL and has to again make San Jose a Cup contender. Of course, that has been said every year for the last several when discussing the perennial underachievers who always implode in the playoffs, including a first-round ousting last season to the eighth-seeded Anaheim Ducks. Now, everyone’s reputation is really on the line bringing in the problem child known as Heatley, as the Sharks had to sacrifice some of their depth, giving Milan Michalek and Jonathan Cheechoo to the Sens. Granted, it was the right move for the San Jose brass, and with Joe Thornton as a linemate, Heatley could conceivably challenge Alex Ovechkin for the goal-scoring title this campaign. Also remember, Cheechoo is a couple of years removed from his 56-goal season that’s looking more and more like a fluke. However, the acquisition of Dany far from makes the Sharks foolproof. They traded defensemen Christian Ehrhoff and Brad Lukowich to Vancouver to make cap space, and they lost defensive forward Mike Grier to the Buffalo Sabres. Of course, they still have a great core, and they re-signed all their really important players, such as Rob Blake and Ryan Clowe. Of course, I believe this somehow will all be for naught, as there’s a sneaking feeling that the Sharks are simply cursed and will see another first-round exit this year after finishing high.

Anaheim Ducks: At the trade deadline last season, the Ducks acquired talented young defenseman Ryan Whitney from the Penguins in exchange for forward Chris Kunitz in a move that was beneficial for both clubs (especially for Pittsburgh). This year, the Ducks will have Whitney for a full season, as well as fellow late-last-season acquisition D-man James Wisniewski to complement the signing of backliner Nick Boynton from Florida. Of course, let’s not forget that the Ducks still have future first-ballot Hall of Famer Scott Niedermayer on the blue line (I don’t care how old he is), so their D is fine. Don’t worry about the loss of Chris Pronger. Additionally, Anaheim will most likely throw out a top line of Ryan Getzlaf, Corey Perry and Cherry Hill’s own Bobby Ryan, who was a Calder Trophy candidate last season. This could potentially be the best line in hockey this season. Their second line should consist of Teemu Selanne, Joffrey Lupul (grabbed from Philly in the Pronger deal) and the newly acquired Saku Koivu who I think still has gas in the tank… not too shabby. The Ducks are a tough team that likes to push people around (punctuated by one of my favorite goons, George Parros, who sports one of the best porn ‘staches I’ve ever seen), but can play any style, so they should be fun to watch and could be a dark horse in the West. They’ll deal with a minor goalie controversy in camp, as Jonas Hiller stole the starting job away from Jean-Sebastien Giguere last year, but that will shake itself out soon enough.

George Parros: "Hey, don't mess with Koivu, or I'll knock you out with my mustache."

Los Angeles Kings: Ah, the lowly Kings. While L.A. has largely been an afterthought in the NHL over the last couple of campaigns, they made some decent moves this off-season to add to their group of very talented young players who just haven’t completely gelled yet due to inexperience. They made a solid deal with the Colorado Avalanche to snag gritty left-winger Ryan Smyth in exchange for D-men Kyle Quincey and Tom Preissing. Then, to make up for their losses on defense, the Kings signed Rob Scuderi from Pittsburgh. He may not be a household name, but Scuderi has a Stanley Cup ring for his efforts last year, and he will provide a solid stay-at-home presence in L.A. which they’re sorely lacking. Additionally, if Justin Williams (acquired late last season from Carolina) can stay healthy for a full season, he could be a force to reckon with to go along with Anze Kopitar, Dustin Brown and Alexander Frolov. However, there’s just one problem: THE KINGS DON’T HAVE A GOALIE! They haven’t had one in a very long time and seemingly still haven’t learned their lesson. I think their last good puck-stopper was Kelly Hrudey, and people really only thought he was good because of that gay blue headband he used to wear. This year, they’ll probably lean on Jonathan Quick, or maybe even Erik Ersberg, or youngster Jonathan Bernier… yeah, I don’t know about them, either. Who knows? Who cares? They may actually be better off signing Almost Athletes reader Brian Gaffney. At least he has some gumption. Maybe even my cousin Lew could take the job. He has goalie experience.

Phoenix Coyotes: Other than business turmoil over ownership and location of the team, not to mention the absence of coach Wayne “The Great One” Gretzky at camp (yeah, seriously), there’s not much to speak of here. While the Coyotes will miss the playoffs again this year, they did manage to sign D-man Adrian Aucoin from Calgary, and he will lend some stability to a group that could really use it. Honestly, Phoenix has so many backliners on their roster I have no idea who their starting six will be. Additionally, they managed to re-sign a couple of role players that they acquired last year in Scottie Upshall and Peter Prucha, and grabbed Taylor Pyatt from Vancouver. These guys could flourish under a full year of Gretzky’s tutelage (if he remains with the team), but the Coyotes have a ton of work to do… poor Shane Doan. He’s one of my favorite players and arguably one of the most underrated in the league, yet he has been toiling in the desert for years.

Dallas Stars: Um… well, they re-signed Jere Lehtinen for a year, but his best days are behind him… wow, well they’ll be happy to get Brendan Morrow back after losing him to injury last year… OK, they still have Mike Ribeiro, Brad Richards and Loui Eriksson was a nice surprise last year. However, it’s time to face facts: Mike Modano isn’t getting any younger (in fact, the whole team is somewhat old), they don’t have a ton of good depth and the loss of incredible (albeit old and injury-prone) defenseman Sergei Zubov to the KHL is really going to hurt. On a positive note, the team brought in goalie Alex Auld from Ottawa to take some of the pressure off talented starter Marty Turco, but I can’t escape the feeling that it’s going to be a really long year in Dallas.

Patrick Kane: "C'mon, I look like I'm 12. Not guilty, your honor!"

Believe it or not, puckheads, the hockey season is only about a month away, so it’s time to make a concerted effort to get through the season preview examining the free-agent market in the NHL. I’ll delve into the Western Conference with this installment and start with the beloved Central Division.

Chicago Blackhawks: Go Hawks! As I’ve stated before, I’m fully on the Chicago bandwagon right now. Anyone who watched these guys in the playoffs last season, especially in the Vancouver series, knows that they’re fun to watch, dynamic, and can play any style. It seems that their old owner (who refused to televise games because he thought fans wouldn’t come to the stadium… uh, what?) dying was the best thing that ever happened to the team. Anyway, some readers out there may remember that I predicted at the beginning of the summer that the Hawks would lose either forward Martin Havlat or goalie Nikolai Khabibulin but not both. Sadly, I was wrong, and not for the first time believe it or not. The often-injured Havlat moved to Minnesota to help the Wild replace the often-injured Marian Gaborik (Nice work Minnesota, they’re asking for trouble here), and the “Bulin Wall” took off for “greener” pastures in Edmonton (Good luck with that, though, I don’t completely hate the Oilers this year). So, what did Chicago do to remedy this loss? They signed Marian Hossa to a 12-year contract… Yeah, case closed. Hossa is ten times the player Havlat is. What many folks don’t know is that Hossa had off-season knee surgery that will keep him out of the lineup for the first few months, but the Blackhawks have more than enough talent up front to weather the storm until he’s ready, including a certain cabbie-punching phenom (allegedly, Patrick Kane). Also, in goal they still have Cristobal Huet who actually played most of last year while Khabibulin recovered from injury, so they’re fine there. Now, some may point to the loss of defensive forward Sammie Pahlsson to Columbus as a big hole to fill. So, what did the team do combat this? They went out and grabbed John Madden (no, not the football guy) from Jersey and Tomas Kopecky from Detroit. Those guys more than make up for Pahlsson. The bottom line is that Chicago only got better, and I predict a second straight final four appearance this year.

Detroit Red Wings: The perennial favorites actually took some hits this off-season. Solid contributor Jiri Hudler took off (after much ballyhoo) for the KHL and equally-solid Mikael Samuelsson landed a nice deal in Vancouver. Needing some depth at forward all of a sudden, the Wings went out and hooked the troubled and much-maligned Todd Bertuzzi. However, he’s not the player he used to be, but I still hope nobody turns their back on him or they might get paralyzed. Regardless, Detroit has an incredible farm system and they’ll still be a top-shelf squad. Anyone who saw the play of guys such as Derek Meech and Justin Abdelkader knows this. So, the big red machine will still be right where they need to be.

Columbus Blue Jackets: The Jackets have been pretty quiet over the summer, and not surprisingly. Their biggest acquisition was actually the Pahlsson deal that I already addressed. Other than that, the only really mentionable signing was that of goalie Mathieu Garon from Pittsburgh to serve as the backup to reigning rookie of the year, Steve Mason. This could arguably give Columbus the best one-two punch in the league, as Garon is capable of starting on many teams. Columbus’ disinterest in signing anyone else is understandable. Coach Ken Hitchcock preaches team defense under a tight system, and last year the squad finally seemed to gel, notching their first ever playoff appearance (though, they got clobbered 4-0 to Detroit, but there’s really no shame in that). They didn’t really lose anyone this year and will get back talented youngster Derick Brassard from injury, so it’s certain that Hitchcock will be more than happy to build on last season and ride another steady wave into the post-season, and there’s no reason why they shouldn’t.

Seriously man, where else am I gonna go? Oh, and everyone please remember, the "T" is silent!

St. Louis Blues: This team may be a different story, however. Yes, I know the Blues have some talented young and veteran players and they somehow miraculously clawed their way into the playoffs last year, but I’m not so sure I see a repeat in the parity-driven, ultra competitive Western Conference. They managed to re-sign the 100-year-old Keith Tkachuk, but let’s face it, he wasn’t going anywhere, he’s far from the player he used to be, and other than serving as a leader, isn’t the answer to all of St. Louis’ problems. The only other notable new face is goalie Ty Conklin (from Detroit), who will probably battle Chris Mason for the starting job. I’m not sure how that will pan out, and quite honestly, I have no idea what’s going on with often-injured and old UFA Manny Legace. He may not find a home anywhere this year. This may leave the Blues short at goalie. Granted, Conklin is capable, but the team has plenty of problems on defense. Letting go of veteran Jay McKee was a mistake, as I also mentioned before. Getting young upstart Erik Johnson back from his season-ending incident with a golf cart last summer (nice work, kid) will help, but I still believe the Blues have too many holes to be relevant.

Nashville Predators: … Oh boy. Well, to say things aren’t going well in Music City would be an understatement. Owner William “Boots” Del Biaggio was recently sentenced to over eight years in prison for fraud in his desperate bid to gain controlling interest of the Preds… uh, wow. Even before the final verdict came down, all the turmoil has led to a mass exodus out of town (and I don’t blame them… probably a smart move at this point), including most notably, defenseman Greg Zanon to Minnesota, Scott Nichol to San Jose and Vernon Fiddler to Phoenix. Sure, they’re all role players, but Nashville is now somewhat thin. They quietly re-signed right-winger Steve Sullivan who, when healthy is an incredibly talented player, but the problem is he’s never healthy and time isn’t on his side anymore. They still have Jason Arnott (Yes, I’m still drinking the Arnott Kool-Aid. The guy doesn’t get the credit he deserves), and they’re hoping their solid D-man crew and young goalie Pekka Rinne will get them by, but we’ll see. I have serious doubts. Folks in Nashville should just stick to country music, and go to a Conway Twitty revival or something.

Antonio Nogueira: "I'm back... and I'm bad... and I'm ugly."

Now, here’s an event worth talking about! Let’s get right to it, as there was plenty of action that went down during the night’s festivities. Not only was UFC 102 a pretty stacked fight card (at least in my eyes, it was), but the main event turned out to be a classic, and there were some great knockouts. What more could one ask for?

The night did start out kind of slow, however, as Brandon “The Truth” Vera picked apart Krzysztof Soszynski in a unanimous decision that went 30-27 across the board. I expected a little more from “The Polish Experiment,” but it was clear that Soszynski had never fought someone of Vera’s caliber before. It was also his fourth fight in eight months, and he stepped in as a replacement for Matt Hamill, so he may not have been fully prepared. I still see big things coming in the UFC from the huge light heavyweight.

Then, there was the middleweight bout between Chris “The Crippler” Leben and Jake Rosholt. I wasn’t sure how this one would go. I had previously seen Rosholt in the WEC before and he looked decent, but I thought there was no way that he would be able to stand and punch with Leben. Yes, Leben is still basically just a raw power puncher, and though I like him a lot—he was quite the character on Season 1 of “The Ultimate Fighter”—he lacks a lot of technique and doesn’t have much of a ground game. Anyway, Rosholt kept his distance in the first round and landed some decent shots despite Leben scoring a takedown and trying to work some ground and pound. Then, round two went more Leben’s way, as he started to close the distance and land some of his trademark big shots. I had the fight even after two. Then, Rosholt managed a takedown of his own in the final round and eventually ended the contest with a superb arm triangle (head and arm choke) that he sunk in quickly (thus winning submission of the night), and even though the ref seemed to miss what was a Leben tapout, he stopped the fight on his own anyway, as Leben was going unconscious. It’s been a rough go for Leben recently. He’s definitely a game kid, but he’s lost four of his last six fights, and I’m beginning to wonder if MMA is for him.

Now, on to the knockouts! It only took heavyweight Todd Duffee seven seconds to KO Tim Hague, and he set a new UFC record for fastest knockout in doing so. He also did it with a jab, which is kind of scary. Sure, it was a roundhouse left while Hague was on his back that put his lights out, but the damage was already done. Look out for Todd Duffee, he could be someone. Next, Nate “The Great” Marquardt took on Demian Maia in a tremendous clash of styles. I was worried for heavy-handed Marquardt in this one, because I have seen several of the undefeated (11-0) Maia’s fights, and his jiu-jitsu is no joke. Maia has won most his fights via submission. Alas, it wasn’t to be for the Brazilian master on this night. Marquardt proved that every dog eventually has his day, dancing around with Maia for twenty-one seconds before uncorking a straight right hand that actually lifted Maia up in the air making him parallel to the ground and earning Marquardt knockout of the night. Nate also displayed great class by not striking his opponent again while he was down. Maia was obviously hurt and the referee stepped in to call it. After that, there was the much anticipated matchup between Thiago Silva and “The Dean of Mean” Keith

Thiago Silva: Another new sheriff in the already crowded light heavyweight division?

Jardine. Almost readers may remember me criticizing Jardine not too long ago for not being able to live up to his catchy moniker. Well sadly, Jardine did little to prove me wrong, as Silva only needed ninety-five seconds to drop Keith on the canvas via strikes. Despite Jardine’s unorthodox style, he seemed no match for Silva’s quickness, and quite frankly I’m now very worried for Jardine’s career. As tough as he is, Jardine may soon become just another mere stepping stone for younger fighters within the division to climb the latter with.

It’s also worth mentioning (because it was brutal to watch) that Aaron Simpson scored a deserved TKO over Ed Herman, but I’m sure the fight didn’t end how anyone wanted it. Simpson pretty much dominated Herman in the first round, and during one of Simpson’s takedowns it was clear that something happened to Herman’s knee. Miraculously, Herman made it out of the round, and to his credit made a valiant effort to answer the bell for the second, but seventeen seconds in, Herman tried to throw a high roundhouse kick with his right leg and on the slow-motion replay fans could see what appeared to be the ACL of his left leg pop. This sent Herman screaming to the canvas, which called for a halt to the action. It was cringe-worthy, and something nobody really wants to see.

Finally came the main event of the evening. The 46-years-young Randy “The Natural” Couture took on Antonio Rodrigo “Minotauro” Nogueira in a battle of heavyweight titans. These are two colossal former champions. Couture is already a hall-of-famer and Nogueira will be. Couture is the only fighter to win a belt in different weight classes, and Nogueira is the only man to have held both the UFC and PRIDE heavyweight titles. Many folks appeared to like Couture in this matchup, but I think a lot of that had to do with Antonio’s poor performance against Frank Mir. However, “Minotauro” had to deal with several injuries for that fight, and had just gotten over a staph infection. People (and Nogueira) will maintain that’s no excuse, but needless to say, he was incredibly eager to prove that he hadn’t lost his edge. Anyway, the pair of giants engaged in a back and forth war, at least as far as the standup was concerned. Nogueira perhaps seemed to land more power punches, but Couture gave plenty back and wasn’t any worse for wear. However, I think it was Nogueira’s several strong and deep submission attempts that won him the fight. It was a unanimous decision for Antonio, 30-27, 30-27, 29-28 (I had him winning all three rounds), even though Randy did manage to escape the submissions cunningly and get back to his feet, proving that he’s still the best wrestler in the game. Regardless, the bout was closer than indicated on the scorecards, and while Couture was certainly disappointed, losing almost didn’t seem to matter. At this stage in his career, it’s almost as if it’s simply about taking on and facing new challenges for Couture. It’s an attitude that I hope I can only begin to have when I hit forty-six. I don’t even like to leave the house now. Also, this win for Nogueira should also set up a title shot for him against Brock Lesnar. That should be fun, especially for me as I continue to stay in the house.

Uh, hey Brett, you're supposed to be over here! Eh, whatever.

OK, I was going to do another NHL free-agency piece this week, but after hearing this news, I had to put that on the back burner for a minute. Yes, everyone’s favorite flip-flopper, Brett Favre is in the NFL… again. And he’s now with the (gulp)… Minnesota Vikings?!… again (sort of). Oh and yes, I know, my esteemed colleague, Brian, recently did an article on #4, as the final chapter of the tired Favre saga had seemingly been written. However, that just wasn’t the case… again. So, before I go on, I feel I must plea with all Favre-jersey wearers out there (yes, including Sir Brian) to take that beloved sweater and burn it in effigy, because I just can’t have that much respect for those who still call themselves fans of the washed-up (albeit future Hall of Famer and admittedly one of the best players ever) old signal caller who changes his mind more than Britney Spears forgets her underwear.

That’s right, after announcing his (what, fourth?) retirement a mere three weeks ago… again, after attempting a comeback from surgery… again, Brett did another turnaround… again, and signed a two-year contract with Minnesota… yes, one of the Green Bay Packers’ biggest rivals. The 39-year-old decided that he now is actually alright to give it a go… again, and didn’t want to have any regrets… again, because he still loves to play. Well, that’s great Brett. However, I’m completely sick of the guy, and I hope everyone else is, too. Besides, in all honesty, I think I would rather have Steve McNair under center for the Vikings this year. Alright, I know, I know, that was a bit harsh, and I liked McNair, so I hope he’s resting in peace, but my point is that even though Favre is one of the best ever, he’s not an elite quarterback anymore.

Listen, I should preface all of this by saying that I’m actually a Vikings fan. I have been since the late ‘80s, so maybe this is affecting me more than it should. Many would probably say, “Sieck, you should be happy that Favre is now in Minnesota because he’s still an upgrade over Tarvaris Jackson and Sage Rosenfels.” OK, that’s fair enough, but doesn’t anyone remember Favre’s finish with the Jets last year? They finished 1-4, and Favre’s TD/Interception ratio was abysmal. His arm is nowhere near what it used to be, and it’s my estimation that he will turn the ball over about a billion times this year. He loves to force plays, and because he’s “Brett Favre,” he’s not going to listen to head coach Brad Childress, and Childress isn’t going to be able to keep Brett from being Brett, just like Eric Mangini couldn’t with the Jets last year. At least Rosenfels and Jackson would have to heed warnings from the coaches. Furthermore, it’s inevitable that the reputation of Favre is going to take carries away from Adrian Peterson when the game is on the line (and the running game, along with the defense, is the true strength of the team). So, are the Vikes really better off with Favre? Also, it really shouldn’t surprise anyone that Favre’s performance declines towards the end of the year, because he’s older than death. ESPN reported that since 2005, Favre’s numbers in the last five games of the season are eerily similar to the finish with last year’s Jets. Sounds like a great way to end the season when the NFC North title will probably be on the line. However, maybe I’m panicking for nothing. Old Man River will most likely never make it to the end of the season. He’s so beat up that the ghost of Judy Garland probably has to oil his joints before a game.

I will probably take heat for this, but the bottom line is that the people who are going to

Ricky Williams: "Hey, mind if I do a J?"

rush to his defense are all living in the past. Can anyone say, “Rickey Henderson”? Athletes have to be able to let go of the game or it does SERIOUS damage to their legacy. (On a completely unrelated note, isn’t it completely illegal to bypass contracts and free agency by retiring and revoking that retirement year after year? Oh well, I’ll leave that one to the lawyers). Hey, don’t get me wrong, when the Packers travel to Minnesota on Week 4 for Monday Night Football, will I be watching? Um, yes. Hopefully, A.J. Hawk can break Favre’s spine and we can be done with this nonsense once and for all. Then, maybe I can start pulling for the Miami Dolphins. They don’t have any players who have retired for strange reasons and then changed their minds, do they?… Oh, never mind. Well, it looks like I’m still going to have to find another squad to root for… again.

BJ Penn: "Enough of Kenny's nonsense, I want to go hang out with Shane Victorino."

Hooray! Last Saturday UFC 101 was bestowed upon the world, and it was the first time the Ultimate Fighting Championship brought its exciting brand of action to the City of Brotherly Love. Yes, everyone by now knows that Philadelphia is the city AlmostAthletes supports (for better or worse) and basically calls home. Sadly, I couldn’t score a ticket to this momentous mixed-martial arts event, but regardless, I settled into my seat at a buddy’s house (thanks for the hospitality and beers, TG) in front of the TV anxiously anticipating a pretty decent card taking place in my backyard. The results?… Unfortunately, they were pretty uneventful—save for a couple events—and I was left feeling like I had just eaten Chinese food. Yep, I was still hungry. Granted, no matter what, I could watch MMA all day, but I was a touch disappointed by this event. Let me explain:

OK, for starters, just about every fight featured on the main card was rather slow and lopsided, with three of them ending in uninspired, unanimous decisions that were 30-27 across the board on every judge’s scorecard. I will probably take some heat for this, but UFC matchmaker Joe Silva or President Dana White might want to start telling fighters to step on the gas a little. Yes, I know that not all things can be controlled that way in the cage and that combatants have specific game plans during a bout, but there has been a good handful (too many) of plodding and listless matches left to the judges lately. That’s not what MMA is about. It’s about action.

Second, the fight between Amir Sadollah and Johnny Hendricks was stopped way too early. Sadollah was dropped with a punch twenty-nine seconds into the first round, and Hendricks pounced on him immediately, causing referee Dan Miragliotta to step in and stop the fight. The only problem is that Sadollah was on his way back up to his feet when this happened (I don’t care what Miragliotta says). Now, I know that the referee’s first responsibility is to protect the fighters, but there has to be a balancing act between that and giving a fighter a chance to recover. After all, fighters in the Octagon are warriors. They know what they’re getting into and they accept it. They don’t need a ref ruining their shot at glory just because they get touched up a bit. Besides, it’s a lot easier in MMA to see when a fighter’s lights go out. The officials need to relax a bit and let the guys fight. Anyone who wants to see an example of a good stoppage doesn’t need to look any further than last Sunday night’s WEC Bantamweight Title bout that saw Brian Bowles dethrone the champ Miguel Angel Torres. (Incidentally, I didn’t see this coming. Torres got KNOCKED OUT, and I didn’t think Bowles would be the man to beat the champ who hasn’t lost a fight in five years, only Torres’ second loss btw). Additionally, (I would be remiss if I didn’t at least mention it) BJ Penn’s lightweight title defense against Kenny Florian was a borefest. I don’t know what KenFlo was thinking with his game plan. Did he really think he was going to wear out a world class athlete like Penn? I actually laughed when Penn finally got tired of Florian’s act in the fourth round, simply threw him to the ground and choked him out.

There’s another thing I need to get off my chest, and I almost hate to mention it, because it may call into question my Philadelphia fandom. At one point, a brawl erupted in the crowd. I know, big surprise. I don’t know the details of what happened (if anyone does, please let me know), but during one fight announcer Joe Rogan actually stated, “No one in the building is paying attention to the fight in the Octagon right now.” This leads me to ask: Philly, can we reel it in a little bit? Don’t get me wrong, there’s a part of me that’s proud of the fact that we have a reputation as a rough and tough bunch of fans. However, there’s a fine line between being a dedicated and feral crowd and being a bunch of thugs and criminals. There was undoubtedly a ton of “tough guys” in the crowd sporting their Affliction and Tapout gear who thought it would be cool to start showcasing their “skills.” I can only hope that these punks were promptly stomped by security. Leave the fighting to the pros everyone, please.

Forrest Griffin: "Mommy! The bad man won't stop hurting me!"

Finally, here’s my biggest problem with UFC 101: Yes, the Anderson Silva/Forrest Griffin fight, if anyone can call it that. Let me preface this by saying that Forrest Griffin is my favorite fighter. Sadly, I don’t think I can call him that anymore. He dropped about ten slots Saturday. However, the saddest part of all this is that some are calling Anderson Silva’s performance his most impressive display of skills yet. I heartily disagree. I think it was more a case of Griffin completely embarrassing himself. I’m not trying to take anything away from Silva. It’s impossible to do so. He’s the best pound-for-pound fighter in the world. But something strange was going on with Griffin. This was supposed to be the biggest challenge of Silva’s career. The middleweight champ had to come up in weight to take on a former light heavyweight title holder. We’re not talking about a slouch here. Win or lose, Griffin has had incredible fights with the UFC elite, including Quinton Jackson, Keith Jardine, Tito Ortiz, Mauricio Rua and Rashad Evans. Of course, he’s also responsible for the greatest fight in UFC history when he won The Ultimate Fighter Season 1 crown over Stephan Bonnar. So, what happened? Griffin was a joke against a smaller (albeit slicker) opponent who basically toyed with him for three minutes before knocking Griffin down for the third time in the first round (with a jab while retreating), thus calling for Griffin to VERBALLY TAP, pleading with Silva not to hit him anymore. That can’t happen. It was later revealed that Griffin’s jaw was dislocated, but I don’t care. This is a guy who fought with a broken arm once before. Griffin then sprinted back to the dressing room without saying a word, taking my tongue with him. I hope Griffin can rebound from this, but there’s a chance many folks saw his last appearance on the main card for a while that night, and there’s a chance I’m in the market for a new favorite fighter… and I’m still hungry.

Pittsburgh Penguins: As I’ve stated before, life just keeps getting better for the current Cup Champions. There hasn’t been a lot of major movement as far as free agency, but the key is that all their major components are still in place. Readers may remember me talking about the St. Louis Blues’ buyout of defenseman Jay McKee, and how I didn’t understand it, and how he would most likely land with a struggling team willing to gamble on him. Well, where did he end up? You guessed it. I love being half-right. McKee (again, one of

Jay McKee: "You mean I don't have to play in St. Louis anymore? Sweet, I love Cup contenders."

the best shot blockers in the NHL when healthy) will more than make up for the couple of D-men the Pens lost. Signing tough guy Mike Rupp away from New Jersey was also a good move, as they need to keep up with the slew of other goon signings within the division. Additionally, the re-signings of playoff heroes Ruslan Fedotenko and Bill Guerin (yes, even at age 38) were extremely smart. The Pens should win the Atlantic this year. Also, I guess it’s time I humbly (but very begrudgingly because I don’t like them) apologize to the Pens because last year I said I didn’t think they looked that good on paper. I guess that’s why they play the games, and I guess that’s why I’m writing this blog and not coaching in the NHL.

Philadelphia Flyers: Oh boy… Well, it’s no secret that we’re a bunch of Philly homers here at almostathletes.com. Sadly, I think the Flyboys have some big questions coming into this season, and it’s proof that not only they, but the whole league hasn’t yet figured out how to manage the salary cap. I’ve already talked about the Chris Pronger deal in a previous column. Do I like it? Yes. Do I think it leaves them thin at forward? Yes, and while I like the signing of middleweight tough guy Ian Laperriere, I think they’re going to need someone else. Will a second-year Claude Giroux and a healthy Daniel Briere make up for the fifty goals they just lost letting go of Mike Knuble and Joffrey Lupul? We’ll see. However, the Flyers may have even bigger issues with which to drop the gloves. With Pronger, Laperriere, Scott Hartnell, Riley Cote, Aaron Asham and Dan Carcillo all in the mix, there’s no doubt in my mind that the Flyers will be the most penalized and most suspended team in the NHL this year, which begs the question: Will the goaltending hold up? Unfortunately, I have doubts. They’re taking a big chance on the tandem of Ray Emery (another possible penalty minutes problem who so wore out his welcome that he was relegated to Russia last year) and Brian “this is my third stint as a Flyer” Boucher. It doesn’t sound impressive, but I’m hoping the Flyers’ brass sees something in Emery that I don’t. To his credit, he did lead the Senators to the Finals a couple years ago, but that was when they had the best offense (and possibly defense) in the league. We’ll keep our skates crossed.

New York Rangers: (Pause for composure) It’s no secret that I hate the Rangers more than any other team in sports (yes, even more than the Dallas Cowboys). They’re a wretched and evil squad, and I don’t enjoy talking about them. This aside, they have made some moves that need to be discussed. Of course, their biggest move was grabbing Marion Gaborik from Minnesota for a five-year, 37 million dollar deal. Actually, I don’t have any problem with that. While that’s a nice and fair payday for a player who, when healthy, is a point-per-game guy (yeah, he’s that good and easily one of the fastest skaters in the league, but who would know because who cares about the Minnesota Wild?), Gaborik is made of glass and plays about twenty games a season. That sounds good to me. Someone tell the Rangers that I think Caspar the Friendly Ghost is also available. Anyway, the Blueshirts unfortunately also signed Donald Brashear away from the Caps, which should haunt just about everyone in the division, because he’s still a top-five pugilist. Getting Chris Higgins from Montreal in the deal for Scott Gomez will also help. However, the signing I will give them the highest marks for is the luring of Ales Kotalik from Edmonton. Believe it or not, the perennial 15-20 goal scorer could be a difference-maker. The Rangers should again be tough and talented like they always are, but for some reason this team never seems to gel properly, and that’s fine with me.

New Jersey Devils: Folks could hear a pin drop in New Jersey. There has literally been nothing going on in the Devils camp. However, when a team has the best goalie to ever play the game in Martin Brodeur, they really don’t have to do much. I often believe that Marty could play all by himself, five-on-none, and somehow still win, much like when Bugs Bunny played every position in a baseball game. Of course, the re-signings of Johnny Oduya and Travis Zajac certainly won’t hurt. The Devils will again still be good in the most competitive division in the NHL, and a team nobody wants to play in the playoffs.

Martin Biron: "Third string?... WHAT?!"

New York Islanders: Hold on, I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. I know I just stated that the Atlantic is the best grouping in hockey, but these jokers are an enormous exception. I have previously talked about what a ridiculous a franchise the Isles are, and unfortunately for them, I now have to provide further proof. It’s bad enough that they hilariously gave their franchise-and-made-of-balsa-wood goaltender, Rick Dipietro, an inflated and unprecedented fifteen-year contract. Rick is still having health issues and won’t be ready to start the season. So, what do they do to solve this problem? Yep, they signed two goalies. The Islanders took Dwayne Roloson away from Edmonton, and grabbed Martin Biron from the Flyers… Uh, what? Now, what are they going to do when Dipietro is healthy? It’s most likely going to leave someone (most likely Biron) out in the cold, or press box. Biron certainly won’t be happy being a third string (to think, he wanted big money to be a starter), and the Islanders won’t be happy when they can’t yield anything for him in the trade market. It never ends for these weirdos. Why didn’t they try to get some help for rookie and No. 1 pick John Tavares? Now, readers may ask, “Sieck, doesn’t Tavares have anyone to play with to help the Isles turn things around?” And, the answer is a resounding, “no.” Really, there’s no one. OK, there’s Doug Weight, who I think turns 100 years old this season. Yeah, Kyle Okposo is alright, but who cares? Mark my words, I know I’m not going out on a limb by guaranteeing these nerds finish dead last in the league… again.

OK, first there was the semi-outrageous, but still slightly funny story about former New Jersey Nets and current San Antonio Spurs star Richard Jefferson calling off his wedding at almost the 11^th hour to a Nets cheerleader/dancer. There are rumors that it was so last minute, people actually started showing up for the ceremony that wasn’t happening. Now, this is by no means an ideal situation. It’s always best to know well ahead of time whether one wants to get married or not. Subsequently, Jefferson was grilled a little in the press. However, let’s think about this. What would have been the ultimate transgression here? I think it would have been entering into a loveless marriage when Jefferson knew he didn’t want any part of it. I actually give the guy some props for being a man and stepping up to admit he made a mistake, no matter how late it was. Therefore…

Perceived Indiscretion: Leaving a would-be bride at the altar.

Real Indiscretion: Getting married when it’s not the right move.

Can I have everyone's attention please? Leave them girls alone.

Next, there’s the tragic event surrounding the murder of former boxing champion Arturo Gatti. The lightweight and welterweight pugilist was found strangled in a Brazilian hotel room a few weeks back. His wife, Amanda Rodrigues, is being charged with first degree homicide since Gatti’s blood was found on her purse strap, and since there was reportedly no one else to come into the room but her. It’s alleged that Rodrigues just could not explain why she didn’t notice Gatti was dead with her in the room for ten hours before someone else found him. Now, here’s a little background: It’s also alleged that the Gatti/Rodrigues union was a tumultuous one, punctuated by numerous domestic disturbances. Now, even though I’m a minor Gatti fan (I think his three fights with Micky Ward are among the best in boxing history), I can’t condone hitting a lady, if he did. That’s just not right. However, I’m not sure he deserved to be killed for it. See, Gatti’s wife was a former stripper. Now, that’s not necessarily a judgment across the board. After all, I love strippers. However, I think most folks can admit that many strippers (not all) have issues, especially with men. Gatti had to know what he was getting into. I know that everyone has issues and problems, and that love is blind, but shouldn’t it at least be safe? Therefore…

Perceived Indiscretion: Killing of a boxing legend.

Real Indiscretion: Marrying a crazy stripper.

Finally, we come to everyone’s favorite dog-walker, Michael Vick. It has just

Hey, where's my rape stand at?

recently been announced that the former Atlanta Falcons QB will be allowed to play this season (on week 6) if he can find a job. Of course, for anyone who has only been standing in a corner and drooling from the mouth for the last couple of years, this is after serving time in prison for running an illegal dog-fighting ring. Now, while I think Vick’s crime was despicable, indefensible, and just downright strange for a pro athlete to be involved in, I have no problem with Vick trying to get a job playing football if that’s what he wants. After all, he has paid his debt. Here’s the real problem: Why does anyone care about what Vick is doing? This guy absolutely stinks at his position. Yeah, he’s fast…big deal. While I can foresee this K-9 specialist actually getting a job somewhere because there are so many terrible quarterbacks in the NFL (Can anyone see this dude in a Titans uniform? I can.), this is essentially a non-story to me. Does anyone out there care what Dan Orlovsky is up to today? Yeah, I didn’t think so. Therefore…

Perceived Indiscretion: Running an illegal dog-fighting ring.

Real Indiscretion: Michael Vick playing anywhere but the California Penal League.

I think I’ve proved my point here.