Don’t hate Brett Favre.

Hate yourselves.

Don't hate the playa! Hate the game...You know what? Hate the playa...

It’s not the narcissist’s fault when people gawk.  It’s not the narcissist’s fault when an entire cable network devotes itself to him.  It’s not the narcissist’s fault when people proclaim him savior, anoint him saint, crown him royalty.  And it’s not the narcissist’s fault that we care. 

Look, there are three things Favre wanted out of his trinity of “unretirements”: 

1. More money
2. More notoriety
3. More money

I don’t understand why people get so upset about one man’s self-reflective journey toward any mirror, microphone, or news camera any more than I understand why Bravo seems to take up residence on my television on a daily basis.  The reason my wife can watch an episode of Bethany Getting Married  three times in six hours is the same reason sports fans tune in to ESPN to tune Favre out.  We simply cannot get out of our way.

As a result, I don’t begrudge Favre for wanting to remain the lead story on every SportsCenter.  Nor do I feel like I missed out on anything by boycotting “The Decision.” And I’ll feel no remorse for missing LiLo’s post-prison, one million dollar interview.  I just detach myself from all things sensational in the media, grab a Flying Fish Farmhouse Summer Ale, Youtube live performances from my favorite bands, and fire off hilarious text messages to my long-since annoyed friends. I suggest you do the same because Favre is playing, he doesn’t like training camp, and the Vikes are now the second best team in the NFC (Saints).

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Boo-hoo, Roger Clemens.  What did you think was going to happen? After watching fellow cheaters Rafael Palmeiro (he of the now ironically infamous index finger), Sammy Sosa, and Mark McGwire, each of whom quietly receded into the collective darkness until such time that slime was socially acceptable again, the Rocket decided to emulate OJ in hopes that the verdict would be the same. Sadly, the needle did fit and Congress did not acquit. 

What was I just saying? I misremember...

 Again, as a firm believer and fan of karma, Clemens’ inability to take a page out of his fellow cheater’s, Andy Pettite, handbook will earn him the most coveted of karmic symbols—the asterisk.

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While I’m stuck in a Detroit airport en route to San Francisco with my wife, ten-month old daughter, and mother-in-law, I’ll assure all of our less traveled readers that the Midwest accent is as annoying as it sounds on television.

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From the category of things I don’t get, here’s one: out-of-season-sports-represented-at-in-season-sporting-events.  Case in point—I’m at the Phils game with my buddy Lew, the first of Cole Hamels’ inexplicable two straight 1-0 losses to the Mets, when I saw a plethora of mismatched jersey decisions.  Simon Gagne alternate jersey? Check. Man U home jersey? You bet’cha. Charles Barkley retro, though now current again, red Sixers jersey sans any form of undershirt? Indeed.  I don’t subscribe to the theory that men over the age of 35 shouldn’t wear other men’s jerseys in public (largely because I’m about to turn 34, and I’m a proud owner of the original Favre jersey), but I’m curious how anyone peers into his closet during the dog days of summer on his way to a baseball game and says, ‘Yep, let’s go with the midnight green Todd Pinkston jersey because, hey, the Birds are in camp. E-A-G-L…” You get the point.

"Dammit! Now my baseball, and UFC, careers are ruined."

The New York Mets closer blew off some steam after a loss to the Rockies by grabbing his girlfriend’s father by the shirt, dragging him into the hallway of the “Family Lounge” in Citi Field, and whaling on him until security broke it up.  K-Rod was charged with third-degree assault and suspended by the team. As if that weren’t bad enough, he hurt himself while dishing out the beating, and is done for the year.

The torn ligament in this thumb resulted in him being put on the disqualified list for the rest of the season, and the Mets are now trying to get as much money back from him as they can.  Guess we won’t be seeing him jumping around and celebrating like he just won the World Series every time he closes a game out again.

Next up: Houston Texans reigning AP NFL Defensive Rookie of the Year Brian Cushing has finally been suspended for his steroid use.  Cushing, who won the aforementioned award despite being accused of using roids, tried to defend himself by saying the positive test results were a result of “Overtrained Athlete Syndrome.”  For those who aren’t familiar with OTS, it is a made up disease that – according to Cushing – results from athletes training intensely for a long period, with the possibility of a testosterone imbalance resulting when an athlete stops training.

Nope. No sign of steroid use here. Just an average guy who works too hard.

Nice try, Cush.  You just came off the best season of your entire career (odd that finally happened at the NFL level and not in college), you now have a box-head and no neck, and you have a jawline like Dolph Lundgren – just admit it, this way you don’t end up like Roger Clemens.

And finally, Tony Dungy.  I loved Tony Dungy as a coach.  Great football mind, first African American head coach to win a Super Bowl, and just great with players.  However, Tony Dungy as a mentor…eh, not so much.

First Dungy was disturbed with the Terrell Owens/Desperate Housewives promo, claiming it was demeaning and had racial undertones.  Huh!?! I guess maybe he saw a different commercial than the rest of the world.  Then he backed Philadelphia Eagles QB Mike Vick when he was trying to get re-instated for killing dogs and gambling.  That move really panned out for him when a year later when Vick hosted a “secret” (yet public) 30th birthday party.  At some point during the evening an ol’ pal of Vick’s who “snitched” on him about killing dogs showed up, so Vick had one of his entourage empty shoot him…allegedly.  However, Dungy rushed to his side again, claiming that this was just a bump on the road for Vick, who is on a “straight path” now and won’t have stuff like that happen again.  I bet.

Now he has spoken about New York Jets coach Rex Ryan (who I’m pretty sure everyone loves, if for no other reason than to laugh at him).  Apparently after watching an episode of the HBO series “Hard Knocks” featuring Ryan’s Jets, Dungy decided Ryan curses too much:

“If I were in charge, I wouldn’t hire somebody like that.  I don’t think our young people need to hear that that’s the way it’s done to be successful.  Because it doesn’t have to be that way.”

Now you’ve gone too far, Dungy.  First, the type of kids that would be impressionable to something like this shouldn’t be watching HBO.  Secondly, I think there are far worse things than profanity, sex, and violence that can corrupt our youth.  The guy has been successful so far, he is talking to his players on his team at his camp.  He doesn’t have to curse like that, but he does and that’s the way it is.  He shouldn’t be fined or corrected for using adult language while talking to adults.

"Physical harm is fine, it's cursing that really ruins the youth of America. These kids see pro athletes gamble on dog fights and beat each other up at training camp and thats fine, but hearing a coach curse...that's the real problem."

So Dungy, take it easy big guy.  Nobody criticized you when you decided to fill the void in your life left by the tragic loss of your son by coming to the aide of every “wayward” African American athlete, so relax.  I am sure that Rex Ryan is the devil for cursing, but Mike Vick stealing animals out of people’s backyards and making them fight to the death is just really misunderstood.

Maybe Dungy will take Tennessee Titans running back LeGarrette Blount under his wing next.  Blount was famous for missing almost all of his senior season at Oregon when he punched an opposing player in the face during the post game festivities, following a loss to Boise State.  Blount read the “sincere” apology that was written for him, and swore he was changed man.  So what did he do when he got a second chance and was drafted by the Titans?

You guessed it.  He punched a teammate in the face at training camp.  Apparently Blount was getting his helmet ripped off by the defense while running plays at practice.  So Blount did what any self-respecting man would do…he punched defensive end Eric Bakhtiari in the face (or helmet, since he still had his on – click here).  Now I know it is training camp, and this stuff happens, but wouldn’t you think if you were Blount and had that history you’d be avoiding instances where you had to “keep it real” and throw punches?  But, if we follow the teaching of Tony Dungy, it’s clear that Blount doesn’t curse, so no matter how much physical harm he causes to other human beings, he’s still a better man than Rex Ryan.

"I might retire, I might not - but either way it's fun for me to watch you guys speculate all offseason long."

That right there should have been a dead giveaway, “according to sources.”  Look, if this was Tom Brady, or Terrell Owens, or even someone like Edgerrin James (you know, a player who you haven’t heard of for so long you think they’ve retired, but really they are still playing), I could see this being a story.  Sources close to them would know.  However, sources close to Favre (teammates, his wife, his barber, his 3rd grade teacher, or whoever ESPN is using) have no idea, have never had any idea, and will never have an idea.  This is how Favre works and I thought we all knew that by now.

I love the guy, but let’s be realistic, he isn’t known for his decision-making.  Not only has he waffled about this decision for the past four-plus years, but – as everyone knows – he as even gone so far as to retire, and then unretire…twice.

With Brett Favre there should not be any stories, any speculation, any career-montages, any phone interviews with other players or former teammates, or any debates about what he is doing until he actually does it.  If September 9th rolls around and Brett isn’t in uniform standing on the Minnesota sidelines in the Superdome, then we can start the “retirement” coverage.  Come to think of it, let’s just wait until the 2010 season is over and he hasn’t played in a game to rule it official (and even then, we should still be a little uncertain).

I am just sick and tired of hearing about this.  There is no Brett Favre story until he doesn’t show up for the Vikings season-opener, then the ESPN NFL “Insider” can do his job, because he certainly dropped the ball on this one.

"We are getting word from Brett's mechanic that when he was informed about needing a new transmission, he replied by saying 'I don't know if it's worth it.' This could shed some light on his current situation with the Vikings, maybe his decision with his truck is foreshadowing for his decision about playing this year. That's right folks, you heard it here first - breaking news, Favre is retiring...probably."

Schefter apparently talked to some Vikings’ players who claimed they received a text message from No. 4 saying “This is it.”  That to me says nothing about retirement; if anything I would take it to mean he was coming back.  Look, unless Schefter just got to the “New World” of America, he should know that when you say the phrase “this is it” it normally means you are doing something one last time and then you’re done.  If you ask someone to give you a ride everyday and one day they say “this is it,” that doesn’t mean no – it means no more rides after this one.  You with me still, Adam?

So that whole 24-hour-breaking-news thing was for absolutely nothing.  The 947 phone interviews with analysts, former players and coaches, the 416 ESPN updates and alerts about it followed by fan reaction, all of it – was a waste of everyone’s time.  So is the addition of “Favre Watch” as a link on your website – unacceptable.  The division races in the MLB are starting to shape-up and get exciting, on top of 31 other teams that opened training camps and this is the story you shove in America’s face all day long? It’s just plain pathetic.

Favre came out the following day (a little late, I know) and denied the text messages and reached out to the Vikings, giving them a timetable for his return.  What that means is that I don’t want to hear about Brett Favre again until September 9th when the announcers are discussing how good the Vikings will be with him, or how bad they will be without him, in the 2010 season.

"Look, this has to stop. I am faking an injury now to get out of this, and if you guys keep it up, I'm going to start stomping skulls."

And while I’m on the subject, Albert Haynesworth failing a conditioning test is no longer a story.  The guy has either failed it with flying colors, or chose not to run it for the past week now.  I don’t need to see a headline that runs “Haynesworth fails 15th conditioning test.”  He’s fat and out of shape, we get it.  Unless he quits, gets seriously injured, passes the test, or dies on the field trying, it has ceased to be a good story to follow, OK? I hope this helps, ESPN – now give it a rest.

No, I meant stud with the ladies! Common mistake.

Alright, as much as I hate to admit it, my man crush, Jayson Werth, is not a big-time player.  Despite my t-shirt bearing his likeness and the slogan, “Werth is money,” despite my unnatural desire to invade Olde City with him for an evening, and despite my lackluster ability to grow a beard in his honor, he just can’t carry a team.  Instead of spitting stats that we all know are accurate and ominous, we can just agree that sometimes guys are good only because of other guys (an Utley-Howard opener makes his job as headliner much easier); however, elite players are those who are great in spite of other players, circumstances, or support. The bearded heartthrob has been catapulted into the cleanup spot because, and only because, of injury and has done nothing to make us stop putting X’s on each day that passes until the Big Piece gets back.

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I’ve noticed a disturbing trend in young athletes of every race, sport, and, above all, talent level.

Slow walking.

As a coach and official for 11 of our calendar’s 12 months, I am privy to all kinds of student athletes—born leaders, playing-because-dad-makes-me kids, guys who are unaware of how good, or bad, they really are, AAU lunatics, and disproportionate body shaped players in the wrong sport. No matter at what school, gym, or field I find myself, the slow walkers are taking over. You know the type. They wear open-toed Nike sandals with or without socks as they walk into the gym. They have a drawstring Under Armour backpack, which holds little more than their cell phones, strapped in place. They have two or three pairs of socks or shorts on for reasons that still escape me. They have half-opened eyelids as if looking and walking at the same time is taking every ounce of their athleticism. And they are invariably, unquestionably, unequivocally average players. I officiate a summer basketball league that features kids from 3-4 grade through the JV level. One JV player in particular embodies everything I just outlined about the slow walker. (1) He’s a junior on JV, which isn’t shameful at its surface depending on the school and program (2) It’s a summer league (3) He’s the fourth best player on his team though he’s the point guard and his father is the head coach (4) He’s a junior on JV.  As a result, I propose the following edict—athletes must walk at a rate that is in direct proportion to their actual skill level. So if you are an awful player, whether you know it or not, you should be sprinting to every position, every game, and every post game speech.  If you’re a blue-chip, division I, future pro, go ahead and drag your feet across the suburban high school gym while you convince yourself that people are watching you, which inspires you to walk even more slowly. Those of you athletes in the middle of these two extremes, I’ll race you to the other side of the field.

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While I didn’t listen to Eagle Corp.’s “state of the team address,” and never will, I did hear the speech’s Cliffs Notes, and I’ll only address what we all know is obvious.  Owner Jeff Lurie, much like the entire brass, just doesn’t get it.  Regarding Mike Vick’s 1,342^nd chance in the league, Lurie admitted that Vick shouldn’t have been at the now infamous party but, meh, he didn’t pull the trigger; plus, Vick is now the proud owner of the completely useless distinction of being the organization’s greatest first year player “in terms of the community.”

Alright, Michael. But one more time and you're in big trouble, mister. I mean it!

Um, what choice did he have? And what does this say about countless other Birds who worked in the community because they felt it a necessary part of their career? Or because they genuinely care about people and animals?  Furthermore, why are we spending so much time discussing the backup quarterback, ostensibly, of a team who is no better than 8^th in the NFC? Why is this ownership and front office so woefully disconnected from its fan base?  Why am I driving up my word count on this issue?

Thank God for fantasy football and survivor pools.

"Hey, I'm sorry about Cliff. I hope you understand why I did it...anyway, does that make up for it? Are we cool?"

The Phightin’s sent away young, stud-pitcher J.A. Happ (a runner-up for Rookie of the Year last season) and two prospects to the Astros for Houston ace Roy Oswalt (and some cash to help pay for Roy’s hefty contract).  While Amaro Jr. didn’t actually say it, this move might as well have been a public apology to Phillies fan who mourned the inexplicable loss of Cliff Lee.

Now first let me say I love the move – you did good, Rub.  It brings another team’s proven ace to be the Phillies number three pitcher in the rotation for almost nothing.  Not only that, but they managed to lock him up through next season (if they should pick up Oswalt’s option).  Happ is solid, don’t get me wrong, but I’d take Oswalt over him any day of the week – and the other two guys, outfielder Anthony Gose and shortstop Jonathan Villar, I have never heard of (so they can’t be that big of a deal to the Phillies).

Apparently the Astros agree since they have already traded Gose to the Blue Jays for first baseman Brett Wallace.  I just thought it was rather amusing that Amaro Jr. would give up prospects to get Cliff Lee, and then give up even more prospects to get Roy Halladay (great move).  Then turn around and trade Lee to get back some prospects, only to trade more prospects to get Roy Oswalt.  I just think he should come right out at the press conference and say “Hey, Phillies fans, I know I made a mistake, does this make up for it?” and shake Oswalt’s hand while he hands him a uniform.

"God...I gotta get outta Houston, I can't take this anymore."

I will give him this though, the whole time he has been wheelin’-and-dealin’ players and prospects like baseball cards, he never gave up outfielder Domonic Brown – and after watching his debut the other night against the D’backs (2-3 with 2 RBI and 2 R), I can clearly see why.  Smart decision.

Now, how about we discuss some wrong decisions?  Redskin’s D-Tackle/D-End/Pudgy-Cry-Baby Albert Haynesworth finally decided it was time to come to camp and give this whole playing football thing another try.  New Redskins coach Mike Shanahan was happy to have him back, but just wanted to make sure he was prepared mentally and physically.  Haynesworth passed the mental test, agreeing to buy into the system as long as he would get a shot at playing the D-End position.  The physical test, however, well that was a different story.

The over-paid – and overweight – Haynesworth could only complete two parts of the three part fitness test (despite losing 40 lbs).  Players and coaches were treated to a display of Haynesworth’s physical prowess as he completed one of the 300-yard shuttle sprints, barely finished the second, and ended up walking the third.  Believe me, I understand how difficult that must have been – especially for a D-Lineman, but come on.  You’re a pro athlete, a pro football player; physical fitness is kind of required and should be pretty high on your “To-Do” list.

"You want to me run what!?! Nah, I can't do that right now - cut me a break, man." (AP Photo/Alex Brandon)

The big fella’ was already in Shanahan’s dog-house for pretty much calling out the team and then not showing up to any voluntary workouts.  However, Shanahan was willing to give him a shot and put him with the backups, let him learn the new system, and then work his way up – if he could simply pass a fitness test.  It was tough, but he couldn’t.  I guess that’s what a seven-year, $100 million deal will do to you.  Why workout when you can simply dominate in Madden 2011, playing as yourself, while you lie on the bed eating Funyuns and drinking birch beer in one of the 19 bedrooms you have in one of your six houses?

"That guy is here to carry pads, not me. I'm Dez Bryant!" (AP Photo/Tony Gutierrez)

I didn’t get this one at all.  Bryant was putting his foot down for rookies in every sport by not participating in such a vile and physically detrimental act?  Nope.  He just didn’t want to take part in something so little and shameless (and really harmless when compared to other teams and their rituals), because he is above that.  Most teams tape rookies to goal posts, shave heads, or make them fetch absurd food requests from distant lands.  Instead, all Bryant was forced to do was a chore.  Grow up, Dez.

Then I saw his comments about being pretty sure he was drafted to “catch passes, not carry pads.”  Oh, that’s right.  Just like when he was given a scholarship to play football at Oklahoma State…until his junior season when he got kicked out of college football.  I’m sure OK State understood then, and Roy Williams and the rest of your teammates (who don’t know or trust you yet) will understand now.

I don’t know who this guy thinks he is.  He has gone from a beast WR to just an idiot with talent (unproven at the NFL level).  I even considered the fact that maybe he saw Roy Williams as his competition and he didn’t want to carry his pads, as if it would give Roy some psychological edge or make the team think that Bryant wasn’t “keepin’ it real,” but it just doesn’t add up.  All you have to do is carry a veteran’s pads! C’mon Dez.  Williams did the same thing when he was a rookie, and some rookie will do it for you.  Bottom line, it’s still a teammate and apparently it’s tradition down there in Dallas, so shut up and carry the pads.

"Was that wrong? Should I not have done that? I tell you, I gotta plead ignorance on this thing, because if anyone had said anything to me at all when I first started here that that sort of thing is frowned upon...you know, cause I've worked for a lot of teams, and I tell you, people do that all the time."

And speaking of not thinking, good ol’ Lane Kiffin was back in the news this week.  The new USC coach decided that the best thing to do after being smacked in the face with NCAA suspensions and Bowl game sanctions was to go ahead and do something illegal…again.  Kiffin poached Titans RB coach Kennedy Pola from Tennessee by violating the terms of Pola’s contract.  Kiffin assumed that a clause requiring any organization receive written permission to discuss a job with Pola, meant just hire him and see what happens.  Kiffin didn’t even think a phone call was necessary.  I guess he is going to ride this job out until some other major college football program offers him a ridiculous amount of money for no apparent reason.

Apparently Titans head coach Jeff Fisher, a former Trojan and a diehard fan, and the Titans organization are filing a lawsuit against the school Fisher loves so much.  This just makes matters even worse for a scandal-ridden university and a coach who has nothing to show for his mega-contract, but the hiring of his much more successful father.

"Hello, yes, is this the OSU admissions office?"

Finally, I leave you with this.  Former college football star, and current idiot, Maurice Clarett is back at THE Ohio State.  After a little more than three years in prison, Clarett has been granted re-entry into OSU and plans to lay low this way he isn’t a “distraction or a nuisance” to the football team.  I bet.  How long do you think it is before he is trying to suit up again, hoping to win an appeal of the current college football rules about turning pro?  It worked out so well for him when he tried to make the rules “one and done” for college football athletes, then sat out a year (after losing that case), and came into Broncos camp looking like a slim D-tackle.  I’m pulling for him though, I certainly hope he graduates – what a real “feel good” story that would be.

**During one of my first ever Locker pieces, I talked about how, despite the enormous shoes he had to fill, Phils play-by-play announcer, Tom McCarthy, was dangerously close to being replaced by my iPod or the radio team of Scott Franzke and Larry Andersen. Now, a full year later, this completely vanilla robot has done nothing to change my mind. Now, I’ll admit to being partial to guys who actually played the game, but such logic doesn’t affect my appreciation for the other three major sports teams’ announcers—Merrill Reese (Eagles), Jim Jackson (Flyers), and Marc Zumoff (Sixers)—because they have some flair, some panache, some understanding of the tremendous job they have in bringing our city’s teams to our homes on a nightly basis.

While I watched yet another lackluster performance by the Phils during which they dropped three of four to those pesky Pirates, I couldn’t help but take mental notes of McCarthy’s performance.

"I have a microphone into which I speak about baseball!"

Exhibit A: He used the word towering four times during the telecast. Now, maybe we’re all a little spoiled by Doc Emrick’s ability to use approximately 4, 567 verbs during his call of any hockey game, but I don’t think it’s too much to ask for McCarthy to come up with just one more adjective for flyballs.

Exhibit B: I realize the phrase “Captain Obvious” gets bandied about regularly, and usually with at least mild audience chuckling, but McCarthy is doing everything he can to cement himself as the “Captain Obvious.” After the Phils coughed up a three-run lead in the bottom of the 7^th, he delivered this doozie: The complexion of this game really changed when it went from a one-run game to now a three-run deficit for the Phils. I don’t require my play-by-play guy to be a sabermetrics practitioner, but I also don’t need him to fill in elementary gaps like this one.

Exhibit C: His homerun calls absolutely stink. I’d rather pluck a drunken fraternity brother out of the stands and ask him to call, oh, let’s say, Jimmy Rollins’ walkoff last week instead of listening to McCarthy’s completely uninventive, He’s baaaaaaack, in reference to Rollins’ momentous return to the lineup.

**I had the misfortune of briefly flicking past the Competitive Eating Competition on ESPN, which got me thinking about our society. Let me get this straight—Americans can’t appreciate the FIFA World Cup, deemed a game for “foot fairies” by our most clever of wordsmiths, which has been nothing short of amazing for the better part of a month (if you missed the sick Paraguay-Spain quarterfinal because you were afraid you’d catch “footfairyitis” as a result, I’ll submit that it was the second best game of the tourney behind the US win in extra time against Algeria), but we can show up in droves to watch intestinal freaks of nature devour food quickly? And don’t think for a second that the arrival and “arrest” of former champ Kobayashi wasn’t staged for publicity.

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay better than soccer. (By Theo Zierock, AFP/Getty Images)

As a result, I will not listen to those who suggest our country isn’t getting dumber. Or dumberer.

**Wait, Mike Vick didn’t see the light behind Tony Dungy’s shadow? It turns out he really isn’t a very good dude? The Eagles made a personnel mistake? The Wildcat Formation was effective for one year, four years ago? Now I’ve heard it all.

"I can't wait to cash these checks...I mean play for the Redskins." (Photo by Mitchell Layton/Getty Images)

The Redskins responded by adjusting their defense to a 3-4 scheme – but Albert doesn’t like this either.  His new role as nose-tackle in a 3-4 defense is not as “glamorous” (if you can even use that word to describe a d-tackle) as his old role in Tennessee, where he was one of two d-tackles in a 4-3 defense.

Haynesworth was coming off one of his most unproductive years, and I assume was looking for something – or someone – to blame for that (not himself, of course).  He had 29 tackles, 8 assists, and only four sacks in 2009.  While in 2008 with the Titans, he racked up 41 tackles, 10 assists, and 8.5 sacks.  While the numbers aren’t that far off, it was his presence that was most notably missing.  In 2008 he was a poster-boy for the Titans’ defensive success; this past year he was considered a bust and one of many reasons for the Redskins’ dismal season.

Most teams would be pleased with the numbers Haynesworth put up in 2008 or 2009, except most teams aren’t the Redskins and did not sign him to a 7-year $100 million contract.  The team, under new management and leadership (in new GM Bruce Allen and new head coach Mike Shanahan), decided to offer Haynesworth a release from his contract as long as he paid them back $21 million in bonus money.  Haynesworth rejected that notion, and instead thought it was much more professional to just not come to mandatory minicamp and demand a trade.

"I was just trying to help him up! You throw that flag and you're next!"

There have been some rumors that the Redskins could be shipping him out to Minnesota or even New Orleans, but it is all speculation.  It’s hard to imagine a team that really needs him; especially for that price and the baggage he comes with.  Let us not forget that this sterling example of the word professional also stepped on Dallas’ center Andre Gurode’s face (click here in case you forgot about that) – but later claimed he wasn’t a dirty player.  Of course…clean, respectable players make the mistake of purposefully, physically harming opponents all the time.

He is supposedly going to attend training camp, but the damage is already done and I don’t see how it can work in Washington after he has divided his locker room with this little tantrum.  I don’t understand why he wouldn’t just accept the buyout and go elsewhere.  Sure he wouldn’t get as much, but he would be happier, probably have a better shot of winning, and would save some face.  I don’t know how many supporters he thinks he has with that contract he signed, but let me tell you this: if a team offered me that contract to have their QB warm-up by slinging footballs at my crotch before practices and games, I would sign it with a smile and be the first one in that building and the last one to leave.

"Yeah! OK guys, same time tomorrow for round two?"

First, the whole idea of spreading it out over three days in horrendous – it takes all the excitement out of Draft Day.  Teams don’t have to meet in “The War Room” and make snap decisions on who to take after the guy they wanted gets grabbed up by another team.  No more spur-of-the-moment trades that leave fans (Eagles) puzzled. With this new format, all a team has to do is make one pick (or two if they are really lucky/pathetic) and that’s it…the day is over.  They get a full 24 hours to reconsider what they want to do, negotiate potential trades, and eye-up new candidates.

Second, they picked the worst Draft Class to experiment with.  There are about two or three “Big Name” guys, and the most talked about players are a QB who missed his senior season and another who might as well not have had one.

Think about it.  What other Draft Class featured the “Best QB” and potential “First Overall Pick” as a guy who missed almost his entire senior season and is coming off shoulder surgery?  Nothing against Sam Bradford, and he could turn out to be great, but that is the best QB out there?  What does that say about all the other guys?  And Tim Tebow…that kid went from College Football Savior to NFL Joke inside three short months.  I wish him the best, but again, what does it say about the 2010 Draft Class if these two guys are headlining it?  I know there are other great athletes out there (Eric Berry, Ndamukong Suh, Dez Bryant, C.J. Spiller, etc.), but face it, none of them have received as much hype as Bradford and Tebow have all off-season.

"Thanks for all of your support - maybe I'll take off next season and see if I can win an NFL MVP award."

Finally, the attempt to oversell the Draft by NFL and ESPN is nauseating.  Never before has there been so many possible “Big Name” trades taking place during draft day.  They are convincing fans to watch all three days because you never know when Ben Roethlisberger might get traded, or the Redskins might sign T.O. and reunite him with Donovan McNabb, or all the rumors about every team, after the number 10 spot, trading up to get certain players.  That marketing genius was topped off by ESPN running the TOP 10 Best Late-Round Picks, while both anchors crow-barred in the “You better watch Saturday, who knows when the next Tom Brady will be drafted.”

"I hold a bunch of college football records...but none are as impressive as the record I hold for most stories aired about a throwing motion!"

Maybe it’s because this idea was a failure from the start, so they are doing whatever they can to sell it.  I am sure people will still watch it (I know I will), but now they are competing with the NHL and NBA Playoffs, as well as the MLB.  Going primetime might lose some fans considering that when it was on Saturday at noon, people had nothing else to watch but the first round.  Plus, do they really think anyone is going to watch the final rounds that Saturday?  Maybe a few diehards, but nowhere near as many people that would watch it in the old format, by default, simply because they were on that channel already.

I will still enjoy it, and I know most people will – but my point is, if it’s not broke, don’t fix it.  As if the NFL isn’t pulling in enough money they have to break up the Draft into portions to try and make even more.  I just hope next year they don’t spread it over six months, having only select teams draft starting in April and ending at the beginning of the regular season…that’ll really maximize profits, right Roger?

Brett Favre.

No matter what color the uniform, or how old he is, this image of Brett seems to be a constant. (AP Photo/Hannah Foslien)

As a huge Brett Favre fan, I must point out that not only did he throw 33 touchdowns to only 7 interceptions in the regular season, but he only had one multi-pick game (against Arizona when they were embarrassed on Sunday Night Football because their offensive line didn’t make the plane to Tempe).  He didn’t tire out at the end of the year, and despite Adrian Peterson not having big rushing games (because everyone insisted if he had success it would be because A.D. was averaging 400 yards a game), he even managed to take over and dominate a few of these games.  Favre helped his team finish 2^nd in the league in points-per-game, 5^th in total yards, and 8^th in total passing yards.  He made Sidney Rice (whose career was dying in Minnesota) look like the second-coming of Jerry Rice.

However, even after all this success there was still the thought that Favre would choke under the playoff pressure.  So in comes Dallas, arguably the hottest team coming into the playoffs, and what happens?  Favre and

About 90% of the NFL-watching population had no idea who this kid was, until Favre became his quarterback.

the Vikings take them out to the woodshed.  Favre throws for four touchdowns (each more amazing than the previous), zero interceptions, and the Viking defense shut down an over-rated Cowboys O.

I just want to point that out that no matter what happens to the Vikings, whether it be in the next game or in the Super Bowl, Favre has more than proved he is still one of the best.  Maybe it was time for him to go in Green Bay, maybe it wasn’t, but we will never know.  All we have to go on now is the enormous amount of success he is having with the purple and gold…GO VIKINGS!

Moving on to something that I have to comment on…Gilbert Arenas.  For all those people who sat back and thought “Wow, how dumb is Plaxico Burress?” Arenas decided to prove there was someone dumber.  As the story goes, after an argument over unpaid gambling debts with teammate Javaris Crittenton, the two pulled guns on each other.  And if that wasn’t enough, it wasn’t like the two of them were there for a team meeting and snuck them in, oh no, they both had guns (plural) stored in their lockers.  I guess for all the gang violence that takes place at practice?

Are you kidding me?  Arenas claimed that he had brought them from his home to his locker so his children would not find them and play with them.  How noble.  Buy a safe idiot, hide them where your kids can’t reach, put them in a room and lock the door, I mean how many other options are there before you think “I got it! I’ll just bring them to work.”  Imagine a regular person doing that, “Morning Sally, the meeting is still at 10 right? Oh, don’t mind these, I don’t want my kids playing with them.” You would be fired immediately.

Nice Gilbert, way to try and play it all off as a joke. People always pull guns on other people in jest, I could see the misunderstanding.

That must have been the same logic Arenas used when he tried to play this whole thing off as a prank. Or perhaps when he turned his hands into six-shooters during a pregame “dance” before they played the Sixers, to show how much of jokester he is.  As you can imagine, NBA Commissioner David Stern took action, suspending Arenas indefinitely.  Then the legal department stepped in, and Arenas now has to wait until March to find out what kind of sentencing he will receive.  NBA commissioner David Stern has yet to make a decision on what will happen to Arenas after his sentencing (hopefully his career is done).  The team is left scrambling for an answer, but they are just as guilty as he is in my eyes.

Get this: the Wizards organization said they had known about the guns in his locker – apparently he had informed them about the guns when he first brought them in – and they “never thought something like this would come of it.”  Really? I would love to hear them describe the situations that they thought might arise from having firearms in a locker room.  As if the NBA couldn’t be any worse (or more out of control) they decide a good P.R. move would be to let athletes have guns in their lockers?  This way fans get more of a “Beirut circa 1975” feeling when they come to games.